Thursday, October 1, 2009

The Waiting

The Waiting.

Well, surprise, surprise, you didn’t have to WAIT long for me to post another blog. But this one is more personal than previous ones.

Anyone who know me, read a few of my blogs, or my brief grumbles on Twitter, will tell you that I have been WAITING for a job for a very long time.

People say I have the “patience of Job.” I would never wish to have to go through what Job did. I’ve told people never to pray for more patience, because God will provide it and provide more reasons to need patience.

So I joke that I’ve been playing the “waiting game,” as I wait to hear back from producers, publishers, and job’s I’ve applied for.

For this past week, I and many other members of my family have had to WAIT on something no on really wants to arrive. Death.

Earlier this year, one of my aunts died after many years of suffering from a terrible illness, she had it nearly as long as I have been alive. She lived a good life through out the pain, but then finally it was over.

Now, this week, we lost another aunt. In comparison to her sister-in-law, she was suffering from cancer for a very short while.

She had already lost her husband a few years ago, and her son was killed in Vietnam, so for her the WAITING on the approach of death was also the reunion with her family members in Heaven with the Lord.

The cancer was quickly taking over and winning, but her Faith made her strong and she was content in her Wait because she knew the rewards that were to follow.

This past Sunday, she closed her eyes and went to sleep. A peaceful sleep that even our visits to her room could not waken.

Now came the hardest of the WAITING, and that was for us; her family and friends.

Over the next several days, she remained in that peaceful sleep. Her breathing continued as the rest of her body failed. Each moment we thought would be her last, and yet her body held on.

Our WAITING finally came to an end this Wednesday evening.

Though the waiting is over, our pain is not gone. Whether it be loss or guilt, we hurt that our family member is not with any longer. Yet we know we are only WAITING for the time when we will join them in eternity.

Selfishly I think of all the things in my life that my aunts, uncles, grandparents, or another good friend that past in the last two years, won’t get to see whether it be my career in animation, or published editions of my comic book writing. Most of all I feel bad that they won’t be there for my wedding.

And there is more WAITING, as my fiancée waits on me. Maybe I’m wrong, but I’m waiting on getting married until I’ve got a regular job to build up on. How she puts up with the waiting, and with me, only the Lord knows.

…they that WAIT upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31 KJV)

1 comment:

Brandon said...

sorry to hear that about your aunts. I understand what you are going through. Im at the point where I dont go to funerals anymore because Ive been to too many in my life. Ill keep you in my prayers. I've been unemployed since Jan. There was supposed to be a short break between productions, but the break turned into 9 months. A year before that, I found out I couldnt go back to school so I was forced into the job market. I was blessed enough to have a professor that believed in me and I was able to work at his studio, but they aren't getting much work now so I'm interning and getting unemployment. I know it feels like waiting but everything happens for a reason. There is devine order. You may not see it now, but when things do fall in place, you will see why things happened the way they did. Its a struggle for everyone. My dad was laid off a couple months ago, and my mom cant work because of a back injury. I know it feels like things are taking forever, but you have to hang in there and keep the faith.